I have very strong opinions with regards to cycling. A lot of them have very little basis in reality, most of them don’t even matter.
But welcome to the Internet! Every feeling that everyone has is somehow valid, no matter what.
1. I refuse to acknowledge Bradley Wiggins’ knighthood. The guy is a jerk, period. Also, not even born in the UK.
2. I refuse to acknowledge Chris Froome’s knighthood. Oh wait – he doesn’t have that. I just wanted to mention him because he was also not born in the UK.
2a. I refuse to acknowledge knighthoods. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government, or recognizing achievements in cycling.
3. I really don’t care about Lance Armstrong.
3a. Wait – I do care! I saw the TV documentary Stop at Nothing, and I can you that he is INSANE-O. He is a clinical psychotic.
4. Trek’s president, John Burke, is a jerk. He forced Greg Lemond to apologize for claiming that Armstrong was doping. And yet, when Lemond turned out to be right, what did he do?
Nothing. Nothing is what he did. Well, he also bought out Gary Fisher and eventually made his bikes disappear…
5. Treks are the most boring bikes made on this planet. The only current one I like is the Superfly, which was a Fisher before it was a Trek. Otherwise, cookie-cutter bikes with graphics maximized to appeal to consumers.
6. Specializeds are the most boring bikes made on this planet. I don’t care how good the magazines say they are, I would never ride one. If I see you riding one, know that I am secretly judging you.
7. I will not name my bikes nor will I refer to them as “rigs,” “steeds,” or “whips,” because doing so is silly. (it’s cool if you name your bike though, I don’t mind) Bicycles are damn cool on their own and do not need to be compared to other vehicles.
8. I used to not like GTs just because of their “triple-triangle” design. I realise now though, that I was young and foolish, and that those bikes had fantastic paint, and just plain looked good.